Prologue - Here & Now by Faith N. Kobo

The ocean! So still and calm, she watched it for hours as she admired its tranquillity and its enormous strength. The kind of strength she searched for as memories of the previous night went through her mind over and over again. As if she were watching a rerun of the previous night’s events, Nolitha assessed the situation and wondered if she had not missed an opportunity to cry for help or an opportunity to run away from Thozamile’s merciless hands. She remembered that she could not scream; she could not even speak. Her voice was caught by a cold grip of fear and helplessness that made her shiver as she stood there watching the stillness of the ocean.
She wondered what secrets lay beneath the ocean and for how long the secrets will remain buried under it, but there were no telltales. The ocean appeared as a true reflection of tranquillity, peaceful and calm as she stood there still and motionless. Only from a distance Nolitha could see the white foam of the waves as they reached the shore, but she stood there as motionless as the ocean as she thought deeply about ending her own life by taking a fatal jump to the deep end of the ocean and disappear forever.
She thought of how wonderful her life could be from the dreams she had from many years back. She thought of the previous night whose aftermath was not just threatening to steal those dreams she had hung onto over the years but was the reason why she wanted to end her life. She weighed the events that had happened in her life from her early years against her dreams, as she would sift the bubbles from uMqomboti (Homemade African Beer). It was evident that her life was not meant to be an easy one from the beginning.
Taking a few steps closer to the edge of the rock on which she was standing, she bowed down, as a sign of reverence to bid the ocean farewell. She had seen the depth of the ocean that has no end and wondered how far deep the ocean could take her as she believed that was where she belonged, in the deep end. She would disappear and nobody would ever know what had happened to her the previous night. She was too scared and too ashamed to even write it on a piece of paper. She reached for her bag and took out the writing pad and pencil before she positioned herself on the rock so she could sit comfortably to be able to write a note to her parents.
Her mind went blank but her pencil kept on writing effortlessly. She continued to write as she cried until her reservoirs were dried up. Then she felt the lump inside her heart melt into the blue sea; she felt her pain disappear as she inhaled the smell of the salty water. She allowed herself to be enveloped into the majestic embrace of the ocean. She drifted away into the tranquillity of the ocean and her senses were tantalised by the soft breeze as she allowed her grief to disappear into the blue sea.

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